so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
