I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
