I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
When are your genitals available?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
