Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"

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(540): View more from Virginia

i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building

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(516): View more from New York

I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko

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(518): View more from New York

Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.

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(206): View more from Washington

the night ended with taco bell and tears

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(432): View more from Texas

I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?

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(425): View more from Washington

I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage

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(208): View more from Idaho

Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics

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