You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
