On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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