She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize