on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
