Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
you traded sex for a burrito?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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