he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
