But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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