I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Randomize
