He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Randomize
