Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize