i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize