i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
