he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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