Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
