How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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