I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize