I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
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