I don't think brook has ever known best
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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