Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
