allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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