I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize