Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
