eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize