no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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