I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize