he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
