You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
