we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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