This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Your cock deserves a montage
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
