I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
