well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
