Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize