sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
