using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
50% drunk capacity currently
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
