whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
