Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
