Have you finally orgasmed yet?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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