So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize