mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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