In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
