he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
