More tranny stories later!
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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