So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
