But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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