brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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