Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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