Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
