she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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